Cheatham Street Warehouse Serving Texas Music Since 1974

Cheatham Street Warehouse

First Annual

Blind Hog Awards

"Even a blind hog finds an acorn once in awhile" Darrell Royal

The First Annual Cheatham Street Warehouse "Blind Hog Awards" are out! You know, Darrell Royal once said, "Even a blind hog finds an acorn once in awhile," which was the inspiration for our poll. Cheatham Street selected a panel of top judges who reviewed the nominees in sub-committees to insure that the awards were official. After several months and many cases of beer, we are pleased to announce the winners.

Tackiest T-shirt
Brandon Rhyder (Rhyder Hard, Rhyder Fast, Just Don't Miss the Show)

Band Name With The Most Room For Improvement
4th Runner Up: Slaves of Utopia
3rd Runner Up: The Defendence
2nd Runner Up: The Texas WettNex
1st Runner Up: The Derailers
WINNER: Fender and the Skirtchasers

Best Half-Way Popular Band
Mike McClure Band

Best Jug Band Without a Jug Player
South Austin Jug Band

Longest Train Medley
Slaid Cleaves

Best Lookin'
Ray Wylie Hubbard

Band with the Hardest Name to Spell
1st Runner Up: Hays Carl
2nd Runner Up: Honey Brown
WINNER: Dead Wringers (Or is it Dedwringers? - Or Dead Ringers?)

Most Historic Bus
Mark David Manders

Least Historic Bus
The Randy Rogers Band

Best Band to Play at a Train Derailment
Two Tons of Steel

Best Artist on Shiner Records
Darryl Lee Rush (Actually, everyone is pretty good on Shiner)

Coolest Far-Out Radio Station
KFAN (Fredericksburg)

Best Fajitas
Texas WettNex

Best Gumbo
The Gulf Coast Playboys

Coolest DJ Name
4th Runner Up: Justin Case (KBCY in Abilene)
3rd Runner Up: Jeremy Halliburton (KTXN in Victoria)
2nd Runner Up: Aaron Allan (KCTI Gonzales)
1st Runner Up: Rick Star (KFAN in Fredericksburg)
WINNER: Mattson Rainer (KNBT in New Braunfels)

Guitar Player With The Most Guitars
Grant Mazak

Best Pool Player
Lucas Hubbard

Most Athletic Band
Texas Renegade

Best Finger Picker:
Runner up - Carolyn Wonderland
WINNER: Billy Joe Shaver

Sweetest Booking Agent
She's out of the bookin' business--She's got a "real" job now

Best guitar player who started playing at CSW when he was 12 years old
TIE:
Monte Montgomery and Charlie Sexton

Ugliest hat
Missoula Slim

Hottest Music Event
Kerrville Folk Festival

Best BS Between Songs
3rd Runner Up: Larry Joe Taylor
2nd Runner Up: James McMurtry
1st Runner Up: Hayes Carll
WINNER:
TIE-
Ray Wylie Hubbard and Todd Snider (we're planning a runoff soon)

Soundman with the Bushiest Eyebrows
Gary Hickinbotham

Best Song about Morals and Family Values
2nd Runner Up: Wreck of the Ol' 97 (by Rev. Andrew Jenkins)
1st Runner Up: Cocaine Blues (by TJ Arnall)
WINNER: Choctaw Bingo (by James McMurtry)

Most Stylish Dresser
Todd Snider

Loudest Guitar Player
Hunter St. Marie

Biggest Family Band
3rd Runner Up: The McKay Brothers
2nd Runner Up: Sisters Morales
1st Runner up - Island Texas
WINNER: The Ash Family

Most Popular Band Named After an Australian Robin Hood
Reckless Kelly

Most Popular Band Named After a Great Car They Don't Make Anymore
The Hudsons

Most Popular Band Named After a Car Part
Sean and the Hubcaps

Most Popular Band Named After a Legendary Creature That Lives on the Hillsides Around College Station
Sidehill Gougers

Fastest Singing Country Singer/Songwriter Since Leroy Van Dyke sang "The Auctioneer"
John Arthur Martinez

Best No-Show Since Steve Earle
2nd Runner Up: Ryan Turner and Them
1st Runner Up: Live Wire Down
WINNER: The Ryan Turner Band

Fiddler With The Prettiest Hair
Brady Black

Meanest Band Wife
Oh no! We won't go there! We're scared to death of her!

Worst Song
2nd runner up : "Asshole From El Paso" by Kinky Friendman (The Next Governor of Texas)
1st runner up: "I Like Texas..and Beer" by Randy Rogers
WINNER: "...I'd Rather Take An Enema Than Ever Lose Diane" by Kent Finlay

Best Overalls
Terri Hendrix

Best Cover Song That We Are Sick of Hearing
2nd Runner Up : "Beer, Bait and Ammo" By Kevin Fowler
1st Runner Up: "The Road Goes on Forever" by Robert Earl Keen
WINNER: "Come Pick Me Up" by Ryan Adams

Best Dressed Soundman
Cory Ratzlaff

Oldest Dance Hall
Luckenbach Dance Hall (est. 1849)

Koolest Koozies
Runner-up: Texas Renegade
WINNER: Ryan James

Smartest Dog:
Doug Moreland's

Littlest Dog
Big John Mills'

Biggest Dog
Jack Ingram (just signed with major label, Show Dog Records)

Tallest Girl Singer
Marcia Ball

Music Reviewer With the Most to Learn
Rachel Elliot (The University Star, San Marcos, TX)

Best Tattoo
Guy Forsyth ("Your Name Here" in a heart)

Coolest Van
Tie:
Colin Brooks and Susan Gibson

Most Likely to Succeed
3rd Runner Up: Graham Weber (His wife has a really good job and is working steady)
2nd Runner Up: Mark Jungers (His wife has a real good job and medical insurance for two)
1st Runner Up: TIE - Gordon Fowler (His wife has a really good voice and plays piano) and Perry Drake (His wife has a really good voice and plays guitar)
WINNER: Fred Andrews (His wife has TWO really good job at KVET Radio & ME Television in Austin)